"I Know You Love Me....."

All I can think of, Lord.....is how much You love me.  And,  I still do not understand why.  I need to stop trying to understand it.  I have tried to analyze it.  I have written.  I have studied.  There is no reason why You should except that You promised You would since  I am Your child and love You.  It is nothing I have done.  What in the world do You see I can do for You.  I falter too often.  I make offensive statements too often.  I am soooo unlovable at times.  How in the world do You take time for me?  Okay......I said I wouldn't keep on trying to understand.  So, I will stop.....for now.  But, Lord.....just let me say "Thank You , again and again for the gift of Your love to me.  When I go off on my own....perusing the world that you have allowed me to live in.....and do not make a conscious effort to keep you in my loop.....it always amazes me how You draw me back in where I need to be.  Can You accept my apologies for forgetting what is really important.  Even in times of "respite", I need to acknowledge You as my foundation consistently.  Daily.  Hourly.  Too often, I don't.  I want so much to be lazy sometimes.  Can I afford to do that?  I doubt it.  Lord, You don't even have to give me an answer.  I know that the evil one is just standing back and waiting for an opening.  Sealing up my" house" tight never stops him.....he just gets quieter....slinking into the background awaiting a slip-up on my part.  Thank You, Lord for the devotional I read the other day from "Joni and Friends".  You knew exactly what I needed to see.  You have a way of whipping me back into shape without it hurting too much.  Or, even at all.  As I read her devotional I could see that I AM NOT ALONE.  And, Lord (?).....that always makes me feel like I am not such a varmint.  "A hands-off approach to my walk with Christ has never gotten me anywhere.  God played the key role in my justification and I have the responsibility to play the key role in my sanctification", she writes. So, I can see that I am responsible.  If I plan on being the instrument I keep saying I want to be,  I have to be actively engaged in my own salvation as I work it out with "fear and trembling".  Lord, help me see.....help me to "get it".  If I am spiritually lazy by not approaching the Throne of God on a consistent basis.....not properly reading Your word......not talking to You daily.....not "living" my faith in front of others or witnessing.....or even trusting You to run my life.............well, then I am not taking this relationship that I proclaim to have with You seriously at all.
Boy, did I ever just say a mouthful.  And, did I pay attention?  Was I just giving You the usual lip-service.  Shame on me, Lord.  I see where my attention to detail is lacking.
Thank You Father for the update to my progress.  I am always thankful for Your intervention.  I am consistently amazed at the way You love me......and protect me......and give me Your grace and mercy on top of it all.  Thank You dear One.  
I give You praise and thanks.  I give You my heart.  Each word is written with Your name emblazoned on it....and above all....Your will.  I say then....amen.