"MY LETTERS TO GOD": October 2020

Tuesday, October 20, 2020

I know, Lord.....it’s time! It’s way past time.....I use every excuse in the book. It’s just so hard to sit down and think about how to grab someone’s attention with my words. Whaaat? Seriously, Lord. I do worry about that. Hmmm......I’ll bet you’re wondering what in the world I am doing writing these letters anyway. For who? “For me?” You might be thinking......”why bother, Corrine Davis! To impress me?” Don’t worry, Lord! I know that ship has sailed. At my age, impressing You isn’t on my list anymore. I don’t know how to....impress You, that is! I spent way too much time trying to hope You’d be pleased. It was ultimately people I was trying to please. Sunday in church, Doug chose the text from Romans where Paul is talking to the people. I almost laughed out loud because he sounded like me explaining something.....and after explaining, I’m thinking.....”Could you repeat that so I can understand?” It starts out with.....”I do not understand what I do....for what I want to do, I do not do....but what I hate I do! (Sort of paraphrased beginning of Rom.7:15) And onto and throughout to verse 24, makes me a little dizzy. Reading on it says....”For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I don’t want to do”........makes me wonder if I will ever get it right. You know Lord....it’s getting so serious anymore. It has to be getting close to when you would come for us. All of my concerns of “getting it right” are huge. I don’t want there to be any mistake....I want to be in that number, “When the saints go marching in.” I guess if Paul had his own issues about getting it right.....I will try to not let the enemy of our souls, trouble and confuse me. I know that his job is very important to him. His goal is to keep us in a quandary......To keep us anxious and worried about our salvation.....to the point where we just think....”Whats the use?” That’s where he likes us to be......thinking we’ll be on the outside looking in....when our hope is to be on the inside, looking out on him falling into Hell.

Lord......my desire is to live so You would be pleased.....to be like You, as much as is humanly possible. Things have changed so much for me. I never believed I’d be in this position. If there is more You need from me.....I choose to obey.

You know I love watching movies......and I do enjoy the stories of romance and intrigue.....but I am always disgusted when the end comes......and no questions are answered. I want to know what happens in each of the storylines. As Paul Harvey always said...... “the rest of the story”. The ends of some of the stories in the scriptures are not always what I’d love to read. But they are the realities of how life was.....or could be. Not everyone loved God . Not everyone obeyed Him. Not everyone believed the Christ was born. The crucifiction was abhorred by many. I think that thousands of Christ followers could believe that this horrific event was even of God. Born of a virgin. Died, after the humiliation of the insanity that was happening. But, the resurrection was too much to believe.

You know, Lord.....as I talk about this, I wonder if it’s a distant memory for you......or is it like it was just yesterday. I believe that it is indeed a story I believe. As your follower, I would tell You that my hope and determination is to walk into the gates of Heaven.....to be with You and Your Heavenly Father forever.

I speak in love and gratitude to the precious name of Jesus. Amen.

Introduction to "My Letters To God"

My letters to God came about by my need to communicate with Him on a regular basis. I needed to, as a christian, a wife and a mother notwithstanding, pray every day. As a young mother I found myself almost continually interrupted by my two little girls. All for necessary and legitimate reasons. You and I both know satan uses every trick in the book to keep us from communing with God and I felt that he was definately getting the upperhand. So, one day out of sheer desperation, I grabbed a sheet of paper or a notebook (I don't remember) and began to scribble out a prayer for God to come and rescue me. I needed to tell Him EXACTLY how I felt. I needed Him and felt that this was my only recourse. Invariably, before I started writing, when I was interrupted I hardly ever would go back to my devotion time. I'd forget where I was in my prayertime and it all seemed futile.....after all, the wash had to be done, the beds had to be made, baths needed to be taken care of.....etcettera.....etcettera....etcettera. After the first attempt, I tried it again and again until this wonderful habit was formed for me. I could literally stop mid-sentence and almost always go back , and pick up where I had left off. As I found my time with God lengthening because of my determination to do this, it ended up being my solace. Even with two more daughters and a son as the years went by. I often found that it was truly a wonderful thing when I would search for a word that described what I REALLY felt. Many times in my prayertime prior to this , I would skim over the

hard parts that would express my angst to Him sort of mumbling, "Lord, you know what I mean.....". I was so terribly desperate to express how I really felt. To that, I could only tell Him in my tears and fears and frustration hoping He would still love me. I'd reread sometimes and find that I was alot meaner than I knew He would be pleased with.....or, I was not as bad as I believed I was.

Writing to God has followed me into the years that the world says are the "senior years". It doesn't matter to me. As long as I can hold a pen and write Him all of my heart thoughts, the "mind stealers" will not deter me. I am determined to be God's instrument. I will blow my horn for Him as long as He gives me breath!

As I share my letters with you, past and present, may you find in Him the solace that you need. He will give that to each of us. This is my prayer.

"MY LETTERS TO GOD"

My Life Verse

Tuesday, October 20, 2020

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