It's so funny, Lord! And, not "funny/ha-ha"! I have, for the last couple of days...... tried to write my Prayer Blog post. I have lost one.....I have started two......(still in draft form) and cannot seem to join my thoughts in a cohesive manner. Every sentence seems disjointed.....or a little foolish.....or a bit needy sounding. And now, Lord, I write with every intention of finishing before I leave this house today. It's Sunday. The demands are usually exhausting for me anymore. By the time I get home, change my clothes, and sit down to rest a little.....it's time to go back for Sunday evening service. No....I do not want sympathy. I just want some peace. In all of the demands of my time, somehow, somewhere, I need the promise of peace. Joy does reign. I'm thankful for that. Yesterday, I was writing about loving the precious gifts You've allowed my husband and I to have.....having them under our roof for a few days.....just seeing them laying on the couch, clicking the TV or just napping, is a joy. As each family member departed, I found, amid a few tears, that one day "good-byes" will be over with.
We enjoy our family. That is a fact. And, we have You to thank, dear One. I, for one, am so very blessed to be a recipient of the "quiver being full". You know, Lord......You give us the desires of our heart even when we do not know what that might be. I never imagined that when I married 48 years ago, I would be the mother of this group of people that visit "home" on occasion. Thank You Lord. Thank You for helping me (and their father) grow them into nice people. I have worried, sometimes incessantly, that I wouldn't be able to fill the areas of need they would have. And, I'm not talking about math homework. (That tended to be an area someone else had to fill.) The ultimate teaching tool for mothering and fathering a child, I believe, You provided quite nicely. The scriptures are the nurturing tool every parent needs. I love the promises that fulfil each of our needs. I've been especially aware each day as I look at "Today's Verse" on my I-phone. (Thanks for the idea to send verses to my grands that are in college and a few others You've suggested). I am touched by the promises that fill the pages of Your Word. "Having confidence that we can ask anything according to His will......He will hear us"........to......."Teach me to do thy will, for thou art my God....thy spirit is good; leading me into the land of uprightness"......to......."A soft answer turneth away wrath; but grievous words stir up anger"........to......."For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil......thoughts that give you hope and a future"......to......"For the word of God is quick, and powerful and sharper than any two-edged sword......". Lord, these words are quick and powerful. They do speak to us. They do lift us. They encourage me. Giving ourselves over to You when we feel so inept at the challenge at hand, is and was my salvation in growing my children and now, as I am a senior adult, my solace.
Continue Lord, to guard my heart. To sustain my anxious thoughts. Help me to maintain the sweetness of Your spirit that tends to be elusive to me at times. I would so love to never have to "regret unkind thoughts or words" that have proceeded out of my mouth because of an unruly nature. " I need You every hour. Every hour, I need Thee. Oh, bless me now, my Savior.....I come to Thee."
For this day.....and the possible hope of a new year coming very soon.....I ask.....in Your divine name, each blessing. Amen.
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Sunday, December 23, 2012
Every time Lord......yes.......just about every time I want to write You.....I have umpteen reasons why I can't. You know what the excuses are. Dishes.....beds.....garage to be straightened.....downstairs decorated....make new ornaments for the tree....do some shopping....make up the food list....decide the menu for Christmas day....do the Christmas calendar for the Church family....plan the music for Sunday.....ei-yi-yi!!
And these are just a few of the happenstances that take up a day and all of a sudden, it's time to go to bed. The list gets longer after I cross off and add to it! And, You, Lord.....You stand by and watch me get more and more frustrated as I try to finagle all of my comings and goings. I watch the busy-ness.....and I see the frustration of others. I remember so well how my mother would go to a store and just stand there. She couldn't find anything she wanted.....because she didn't know what she wanted. I never understood. But, it's funny Lord, how you finally see.....and understand all of the desperate confusion. Nothing works. Nothing is "special" enough. Finding something that doesn't cause me to be looked at "funny" is an exercise in futility at times. I guess there is always a place for that.....if you can keep a sense of humor and laugh along. Somehow, as it says in Your word Lord, there is nothing new under the sun. Trying to get a special reaction (a pleasant one) from gift receiver's is something I have decided to leave with You. I am often dismayed after the fact that so many find little need to ever react. And, You know, I am not talking about my kids. I taught them better. Why is there so much ungratefulness in our world. Even discussing this is cumbersome. I think there is something to the "why-did-you-give-me-something....I-didn't-buy-you-anything" scenario. You know, Lord....I wonder if You are distressed about the fact that You graciously extend to us Your gift of salvation.....and so many just refuse to accept the gift you offer. I'm not sure, Lord. But, I would guess the commitment of opening your gift, and then making this change in our life is the drawback. I think in some cases, folks like to hang onto their anger issues as their "reason" for lack of desire to have a clean heart.....or, they just don't believe at all.
I am filled with joy that You have given us such an extension of Yourself. We are so blessed. I feel that to not fill Your ears with our songs of praise to You is so disrespectful. We are loved....and Lord, I feel it so much of the time. (Yes, I have to admit, there have been times when I was so angry with You I couldn't see straight.....but, Lord.....in the life of a committed Christian.....that doesn't remain for long.....it can't. You cannot dwell where there is that kind of sin and/or behavior.) The joy that You allow to be contained in the heart, is joy unspeakable......and full of glory. I am convinced that it is the life's blood of anyone who bears the name, Christian.
Lord, Your name is above all names. It is the time of year when we celebrate Your birth. Yes, we entertain ourselves with special parties, gifts, foods, and celebration with our family and friends.....but, lest You think differently.....this celebration is ALL ABOUT YOU.
I praise Your name, Lord. I ask that in all I pray.....ask for.....and thank You for........that all would be done in the name of Jesus. Amen.
And these are just a few of the happenstances that take up a day and all of a sudden, it's time to go to bed. The list gets longer after I cross off and add to it! And, You, Lord.....You stand by and watch me get more and more frustrated as I try to finagle all of my comings and goings. I watch the busy-ness.....and I see the frustration of others. I remember so well how my mother would go to a store and just stand there. She couldn't find anything she wanted.....because she didn't know what she wanted. I never understood. But, it's funny Lord, how you finally see.....and understand all of the desperate confusion. Nothing works. Nothing is "special" enough. Finding something that doesn't cause me to be looked at "funny" is an exercise in futility at times. I guess there is always a place for that.....if you can keep a sense of humor and laugh along. Somehow, as it says in Your word Lord, there is nothing new under the sun. Trying to get a special reaction (a pleasant one) from gift receiver's is something I have decided to leave with You. I am often dismayed after the fact that so many find little need to ever react. And, You know, I am not talking about my kids. I taught them better. Why is there so much ungratefulness in our world. Even discussing this is cumbersome. I think there is something to the "why-did-you-give-me-something....I-didn't-buy-you-anything" scenario. You know, Lord....I wonder if You are distressed about the fact that You graciously extend to us Your gift of salvation.....and so many just refuse to accept the gift you offer. I'm not sure, Lord. But, I would guess the commitment of opening your gift, and then making this change in our life is the drawback. I think in some cases, folks like to hang onto their anger issues as their "reason" for lack of desire to have a clean heart.....or, they just don't believe at all.
I am filled with joy that You have given us such an extension of Yourself. We are so blessed. I feel that to not fill Your ears with our songs of praise to You is so disrespectful. We are loved....and Lord, I feel it so much of the time. (Yes, I have to admit, there have been times when I was so angry with You I couldn't see straight.....but, Lord.....in the life of a committed Christian.....that doesn't remain for long.....it can't. You cannot dwell where there is that kind of sin and/or behavior.) The joy that You allow to be contained in the heart, is joy unspeakable......and full of glory. I am convinced that it is the life's blood of anyone who bears the name, Christian.
Lord, Your name is above all names. It is the time of year when we celebrate Your birth. Yes, we entertain ourselves with special parties, gifts, foods, and celebration with our family and friends.....but, lest You think differently.....this celebration is ALL ABOUT YOU.
I praise Your name, Lord. I ask that in all I pray.....ask for.....and thank You for........that all would be done in the name of Jesus. Amen.
Saturday, December 15, 2012
Dear One......What do we say? As I have heard, probably a hundred times since 10 am yesterday......"There are no words". And, yet, we hear them anyway. Word after word ....statement upon statement.....edict upon edict......and still, nothing rings true. Everything said falls on deaf ears. No one is listening. No one.
The sad fact is we live in a dangerous world. We manage at times to skate through life virtually unscathed, but, sadly, some are not so lucky. Or, I guess, blessed, would be the better word, Lord. I usually never use the word, "lucky". I like to think I'm above using that particular word. I'm not better than anyone who does say it.....I like to think with You running things in my life.....bad or good, I am blessed by You. Oh, Lord......what in the world do we say about this. Everyone chooses their words carefully when asked,
"What happened?" Some can't speak. The tears that flow though, are the real language here. The children are as articulate in expressing their thoughts as the adults.
Lord, all of them will forever be affected by what they heard....and experienced....and perhaps, saw. Now, already.....and will continue to hear......"Where in the world was God when this was happening? Over and over we hear the same exact thing.....often expressed more angrily. "If He is such a God of love......then how....?"
Oh, Lord.....my heart breaks because of the lack of real and meaningful change. Our cries should be ....."Oh, Jesus.....Savior of the world.....change my heart. Let me be a light in a darkened world. Help me to stop obsessing about what I need and what I want, and be a help to someone else for once. Someone who is incapable of doing anything for me back. I believe with all my heart, You were broken to the core when You saw Your beloved Son bloodied, bruised and crucified. Although, You could have stopped it.....You didn't. You allowed the horrible act to be played out......to show us Your miraculous plan for our salvation. To experience that, Lord.....tells me that You saw the horror exhibited yesterday, and grieved with all of them that were there and still are.....at this moment. We concentrate our words and tears on the little ones who were innocently shot and killed yesterday. Standing or sitting with their little friends.....playing or talking.....doing their numbers or reading out of their books.
They looked up, saw the evil, and then saw You. Gathering them to Yourself, dear One, I pray You will surround them in Your arms, giving them all the love they can stand....for they are experiencing such joy, there with You.
Oh, Lord......for each and every adult.....perhaps, now childless.....their pain and anquish should not be analyzed. They are now and forever will be, broken spirits. There is no understanding this. There is only a level of acceptance of fact and living through the nightmare. Trying and failing perhaps.....but most, certainly trying. Our prayers perhaps can benefit them. It doesn't matter what words we use.....for, as many have already said.....there are few words in any language that can explain the awfulness of evil. Jesus.....this is where we lay on our faces....and moan our prayers to You. These utterings.....I believe...... You perceive and hear us grieve. You know. You understand the cries of our hearts. You even understand the cries of a demented heart.....but given no access to the heart of such a one....You can do nothing. Our hearts break as we see in our minds the process of going to a funeral home, picking out a casket......going to a closet and picking out a special outfit to clothe these little ones in......perhaps even placing already wrapped Christmas gifts in the casket. Who else would want them? Jesus.....Savior of the world.....Bright and Morning Star......help us not to think that we have to have "words" to explain our grief. No one understands as You do. Draw these wounded individuals to You. No matter what their faith might be, no matter if they even believe in You......Jesus, just be there. And, when they call
out.......go to them. Hold them. Love them. The husbands, children, parents and loved ones of each adult killed......Oh, Lord......surround them. I believe there were folks yesterday that decided they just might believe in You, after all. I pray that is so.
Lord, for the young man who did this terrible thing....I wonder about his demise into doing such a dastardly deed. His life is over. The day someone looked at him and called him "stupid"......or "retard"......or never allowed him any respect that any human should have........should make us THINK carefully about the words we say to one another. Everyone needs to feel they have some worth. Everyone needs to feel that they are important.....to someone. Jesus, as I pass by people on the street or at the mall......help me remember to perhaps smile or say a word of encouragement to them if the opportunity arises. I hope to be a better ambassador. I want to help You, Lord.
I need You, Lord. More today, than I did yesterday. I thank You for the blessings I enjoy. I praise You for the sun that is shining today.....so many need to see the Son of God shining on them today. It is so dark without You.
In the name of Jesus, I pray. Amen
The sad fact is we live in a dangerous world. We manage at times to skate through life virtually unscathed, but, sadly, some are not so lucky. Or, I guess, blessed, would be the better word, Lord. I usually never use the word, "lucky". I like to think I'm above using that particular word. I'm not better than anyone who does say it.....I like to think with You running things in my life.....bad or good, I am blessed by You. Oh, Lord......what in the world do we say about this. Everyone chooses their words carefully when asked,
"What happened?" Some can't speak. The tears that flow though, are the real language here. The children are as articulate in expressing their thoughts as the adults.
Lord, all of them will forever be affected by what they heard....and experienced....and perhaps, saw. Now, already.....and will continue to hear......"Where in the world was God when this was happening? Over and over we hear the same exact thing.....often expressed more angrily. "If He is such a God of love......then how....?"
Oh, Lord.....my heart breaks because of the lack of real and meaningful change. Our cries should be ....."Oh, Jesus.....Savior of the world.....change my heart. Let me be a light in a darkened world. Help me to stop obsessing about what I need and what I want, and be a help to someone else for once. Someone who is incapable of doing anything for me back. I believe with all my heart, You were broken to the core when You saw Your beloved Son bloodied, bruised and crucified. Although, You could have stopped it.....You didn't. You allowed the horrible act to be played out......to show us Your miraculous plan for our salvation. To experience that, Lord.....tells me that You saw the horror exhibited yesterday, and grieved with all of them that were there and still are.....at this moment. We concentrate our words and tears on the little ones who were innocently shot and killed yesterday. Standing or sitting with their little friends.....playing or talking.....doing their numbers or reading out of their books.
They looked up, saw the evil, and then saw You. Gathering them to Yourself, dear One, I pray You will surround them in Your arms, giving them all the love they can stand....for they are experiencing such joy, there with You.
Oh, Lord......for each and every adult.....perhaps, now childless.....their pain and anquish should not be analyzed. They are now and forever will be, broken spirits. There is no understanding this. There is only a level of acceptance of fact and living through the nightmare. Trying and failing perhaps.....but most, certainly trying. Our prayers perhaps can benefit them. It doesn't matter what words we use.....for, as many have already said.....there are few words in any language that can explain the awfulness of evil. Jesus.....this is where we lay on our faces....and moan our prayers to You. These utterings.....I believe...... You perceive and hear us grieve. You know. You understand the cries of our hearts. You even understand the cries of a demented heart.....but given no access to the heart of such a one....You can do nothing. Our hearts break as we see in our minds the process of going to a funeral home, picking out a casket......going to a closet and picking out a special outfit to clothe these little ones in......perhaps even placing already wrapped Christmas gifts in the casket. Who else would want them? Jesus.....Savior of the world.....Bright and Morning Star......help us not to think that we have to have "words" to explain our grief. No one understands as You do. Draw these wounded individuals to You. No matter what their faith might be, no matter if they even believe in You......Jesus, just be there. And, when they call
out.......go to them. Hold them. Love them. The husbands, children, parents and loved ones of each adult killed......Oh, Lord......surround them. I believe there were folks yesterday that decided they just might believe in You, after all. I pray that is so.
Lord, for the young man who did this terrible thing....I wonder about his demise into doing such a dastardly deed. His life is over. The day someone looked at him and called him "stupid"......or "retard"......or never allowed him any respect that any human should have........should make us THINK carefully about the words we say to one another. Everyone needs to feel they have some worth. Everyone needs to feel that they are important.....to someone. Jesus, as I pass by people on the street or at the mall......help me remember to perhaps smile or say a word of encouragement to them if the opportunity arises. I hope to be a better ambassador. I want to help You, Lord.
I need You, Lord. More today, than I did yesterday. I thank You for the blessings I enjoy. I praise You for the sun that is shining today.....so many need to see the Son of God shining on them today. It is so dark without You.
In the name of Jesus, I pray. Amen
Friday, December 7, 2012
I've stared at this page long enough to think I may have "writer's block". But....that does not make any sense to me, Lord. Not when all I have..... comes from Your hand.......unmerited. I should have multiple things to say and rejoice over. Regrettably, I've been "under the weather" for days now. Taking some time away from the church to visit our son and wife, I thought it would be a good time to get sick and really have some quality "off" time. NOT. But, that's exactly what happened. I wish I could redo these last few weeks......I accomplished nothing I'd hoped to......I sat like a slug for days waiting for the next to show a little improvement. No life. No energy. Short of knowing I wasn't dying, I still had little thought of "hope" for a better day. Sort of depressing.
Thankfully, I guess, You have a way of making us rest whether we feel we have need or not. Not often do we plan times to get sick. I'd prefer, maybe Sunday evenings about 5:30 or quarter to six.
Not long....maybe just a couple hours! Lord, I don't know if there is a slight smile on your face or not......so, I think I'll move on to another thought.
I often see no reason to write......or talk. I like to just be quiet......sometimes. Then, of course, I believe that I am being totally ungrateful to you when I don't talk with You more often. Sometimes, I feel it's better that we just talk instead of the constant "Lord, could You give me....." or "Lord, I need for You to......" kind of conversation. I am not always wanting something from someone else all the time.
Lord, I hope You don't become annoyed when I constantly am asking, whining, and needy so much of the time but I am so very aware that all I need.....I can find in You and in the power of Your Word. I find that talking to You as I would a friend comforts me. You listen. You don't look at me funny.
A few Sunday evenings ago at Choir practice, I found myself enamored with the words in one of the songs we were doing for a cantata. "Mary, did you know that your baby Boy would one day walk on water.....Mary, did you know that your baby Boy would give sight to a blind man.....or calm a storm with His hand.....?" Would we raise a child differently if we knew they would change the world? I think not, Jesus.......I think not. Oh, dear One.....hear my cry.....help me. Change me. Love me.....forgive my lack of empathy at times. Make me the individual that will shine for You. I heard that recently.....You heard it too, Lord. This dear boy said to me....."I want to shine for Jesus, Corrine." Oh, Lord......help him......and help me to remember that "shining" is important. It's not easy all the time. I felt pretty dull this last few weeks. There was no shining.
Jesus, I give it all to You. I know You know my heart. I will never be the example for You until I learn that You take the dullness and everyday life of an individual, the good, the bad, the ugly.....and You provide a sense of joy and fulfillment that provides the shine that produces a bit of a glow. The glow of You, dear One.
Thankfully, I guess, You have a way of making us rest whether we feel we have need or not. Not often do we plan times to get sick. I'd prefer, maybe Sunday evenings about 5:30 or quarter to six.
Not long....maybe just a couple hours! Lord, I don't know if there is a slight smile on your face or not......so, I think I'll move on to another thought.
I often see no reason to write......or talk. I like to just be quiet......sometimes. Then, of course, I believe that I am being totally ungrateful to you when I don't talk with You more often. Sometimes, I feel it's better that we just talk instead of the constant "Lord, could You give me....." or "Lord, I need for You to......" kind of conversation. I am not always wanting something from someone else all the time.
Lord, I hope You don't become annoyed when I constantly am asking, whining, and needy so much of the time but I am so very aware that all I need.....I can find in You and in the power of Your Word. I find that talking to You as I would a friend comforts me. You listen. You don't look at me funny.
A few Sunday evenings ago at Choir practice, I found myself enamored with the words in one of the songs we were doing for a cantata. "Mary, did you know that your baby Boy would one day walk on water.....Mary, did you know that your baby Boy would give sight to a blind man.....or calm a storm with His hand.....?" Would we raise a child differently if we knew they would change the world? I think not, Jesus.......I think not. Oh, dear One.....hear my cry.....help me. Change me. Love me.....forgive my lack of empathy at times. Make me the individual that will shine for You. I heard that recently.....You heard it too, Lord. This dear boy said to me....."I want to shine for Jesus, Corrine." Oh, Lord......help him......and help me to remember that "shining" is important. It's not easy all the time. I felt pretty dull this last few weeks. There was no shining.
Jesus, I give it all to You. I know You know my heart. I will never be the example for You until I learn that You take the dullness and everyday life of an individual, the good, the bad, the ugly.....and You provide a sense of joy and fulfillment that provides the shine that produces a bit of a glow. The glow of You, dear One.
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