"Okay....I'll do it!"

I will.  I'm here.  I'm up and bright eyed.  The bushy-tailed part I'll leave out.  So very often when You wake me up with a bang.....I know it's for a reason.  You want me to write.....to You.  I have been putting this off.....You know.....this writing " out loud" stuff.  Lord, tell me.  Why is this so hard?  It gives  me a quick way to express my thoughts than writing in long hand.  It shows me very quickly what I have been thinking is a little off kilter.  It also gives me a lot of peace.  Three good reasons to keep it up, don't You think?  Okay, so.....why then do You practically have to roll me out on my unconscious state to get me doing what I know is so good for me?  Oh, yes.  That's right.  People might think I'm a little odd.  Or weird.....or even foolish to think as I do as I speak to You.   And, yes....there is always the "Why are you doing this for all the world to see?"  As of last count, exactly 268 people have looked at these prayers that I have written to You,  Lord.  It seems to me that a few may see that telling You their own heart thoughts is something that clears the heart and mind of a lot of trash that doesn't need to be mucking up the works!  It does clear my heart of the notions and ideas that make my calling unclear.....way too often .....when I hold off on my writing.....I can see where the creature that is called satan, has muddied the waters that threaten to overtake my being.  He can only go where I allow him to,  when I am awake.  Help me, Jesus.....to remember that I really need to wear my Helmet of Salvation to bed.  When I am weary, anxious and fearful, especially.  He creeps in to my mind.  All I have to see is ONE thing that the evil one has touched or created.....and it begins to burn a hole into my psyche.  Lord, he is so cunning.  I aim, with the power of Your name and the presence of Your written word in my mind, that I can cut him down with a word.....a thought....or a song of praise to You, dear One.  I bless Your name, Lord.  And , I praise You with all that is within me.  I  venture into territory that scares me so often.  I must never go without You.  When my heart and mind are stayed in You, then I am free.  By the way, thank You for raising me up out of a sound sleep this morning with that song resonating in my head.   "Who Am I?  that the Lord of all the earth ......would care to know my name.......yes, that's a good way to wake me up.  I needed to access the internet and find out what all the lyrics were.  And, You're right.  They are perfect.....because they fine tune all I tend to think about my own self.  "Who Am I? that the bright and morning star would choose to light the way of my ever wandering....or is it "wondering" heart......both are good in my case, Lord!   No one but You, dear Lord.....can lift me to a higher place than I could ever dream or hope for.  Blessings and blessings and more blessings attend my way.  I am beyond overwhelmed at the mercy and grace You provide me....all the time.  Yes, there are times I have wondered where You are.  Especially at the  anticipation of words needed in any given conversation.  I need You to fill in the gaps for me.  I need You to light the way.....consistently.  I am not great in the "not being prepared" part of life.  I like to have my ducks in a row.  I like to look into the scripture and see myself there.  I love to .....why?  Because my dear One.....I know then, that You in Your own busy-ness....know the needs of my heart and You attend to me too.....as busy as You are.   I wish I didn't need so much attention.  I would like to be a little more self sufficient.  Forget that, Lord.  Maybe one day? when I am old and gray?  Forget that, too!   I already am.  Let's just say, Lord , that when You feel I am capable of "running the show" on my own.....I'll be with You!  And, there I will not be causing any trouble....for You or anyone else.  It is getting light outside now.  A new day has dawned.  What lies ahead is in Your hands.  I will, above all else, honor You today in my talk and in my walk.  Your name on my lips.....my armour  on....I will be Your instrument.  I would like it if You could help me not fall on my face.  It's embarrassing, Lord. (when it does happen)  I always need help getting up.  I don't need anymore dents in my armour than I already do....and I want to be on my feet to deflect the arrows that the evil one propels my way.  Give me Your strength.  Make me strong where I am weak.  Introduce me to a higher level of understanding than I have now.  Make me more like You.  I need more compassion and empathy.  I do not want the issues that arise to deter any resolve I have to be the warrior for You I need to be.  Keep me focused on the prize.
For this day.....surround me with Your power.  I ask all in the name and will of Jesus....the Christ.
Amen.