Help Me to Speak, Lord! (...don't forget the whiteout)

Lord, it's late. And, I seem to be unable to sleep. Often when You wake me up, I'm thinking that
there must be someone that needs me to pray for them or I just need to write some things down that are on my mind. Tonight, I just wonder how I can thank You for the blessings I have.
My husband. My children. Their families. Their vocations. Our ministry. The talents You've
given and encouraged us to nurture. My heritage. The very fact that I was born into a family
of believers. Being able to live in a nation that was founded on Godly principles. Everything
would be so different if we lived in a nation where sirens sounded on a regular basis and no one
was ever really safe. There is such sadness around the world. I'm sure that probably there is a whole lot of it right
down the street. I don't know. I wonder Lord, have I done what You have expected of me? I know that my
"reach" into the world is limited....I am a homebody with little outlet except church and my
duties there. Show me IF I need to reach out more. I really want to please You Lord and do for
You what You feel are the places I can be an instrument for You in. It is scary a bit for me to
reach out and ask if I can do more for You....because it may mean I have to speak to someone.
You know I can really mess up at times.....to the point where I've come to You asking that You
erase things I've said wrong in front of my class or the congregation. Who else can do that?
As far as I am concerned, when I slip up in my conversations and/or teaching....and I'm afraid
I've said something I shouldn't....I feel as if You can take out the old "white-out bottle" and do
Your magic for me. You know, Lord....there've been times when I've said something, in all
innocence, and someone has been hurt by my words. Unknowingly, I've done exactly what I
never want to do.....and don't even know it. I guess Lord, that is why I hesitate talking at all.
This sounds like a weak and wounded soul talking. And, Lord....I don't feel particularly weak
or wounded today, or this week....it's just that I do have those times when I feel as qualified as
the lamp post to speak at all. When that happens Lord, I have to depend on You to do the work
for me. If You are filling my heart with Your words....then I'll be okay. To be Your ambassador
is the job You have given me to do. For a long while, my job was to mop up spills and wipe
noses. Now, after many years of nurturing my family....I still have time to do things for You.
Make it clear. And, Lord....make me WANT to. I know You can do that for me too. And, I guess
Lord, that You and I can make a difference. For the things I ask You to do for me, and for
all I don't even know I want You to do....I ask in the name of Jesus....and the power of Your
will. You are truly an awesome God. What You say and the way You say it is so often, life
altering.....especially when I apply Your truths to my life. Jesus, help me to make You proud.
Love, Corrine......and amen.