Lord, when I wake up with a song inspired by You, it always starts my day with a special touch.  Today I saw on facebook that somebody else woke up with a song and it reminded me of how good You are to all of us.  You give us what we need when we need it.  You provide the verses of scripture we need when we need it.  And, You also make us wait....because we do need that too.  That is the one part I am not too crazy about, Lord.  I was going to talk to You today about the issues that I deal with day to day with this psyche of mine.  I get annoyed because I am constantly fighting with this issue of depression.  Actually, Lord....I don't fight very much anymore.  I just let it ride itself out and that is wearisome too.....not so much for me, but for anyone who comes in contact with me.  My husband gets the full brunt of it.  He sees the lackadaisical spirit.  How he manages to be his cheerful, enthusiastic self, living with me, is amazing...especially to me.  One of my daughter's has christened me "Eeyore" from "Winnie the Pooh" fame.  Lord, I have always wanted to be different. Happier.  More energetic.  A visionary.  Like I said....DIFFERENT! I think I could be a better instrument for You if I were.....DIFFERENT!   Unless You change the whole dynamic, I know I will continue out this day as the same as I am now.  I need You Father, to make this okay with me.  Not just the "Suck it up, Buttercup" mentality, but knowing the fact that You understand my wiring.  You know the details of the circuitry.  When I have done all I know to do....and still feel the ensuing sadness...live  for You and work for You as if there is no tomorrow,  You know the wise heart that wrote the devotional I read today.  You know what I was thinking before I even read it.  It encouraged me.  It didn't end with a "storybook" finale.  Storybook endings  are wonderful most of the time.  They make us smile and hope and believe everything will turn out.  But Lord, sometimes the ending is the "ending" and it's not the one we hoped for.  I think, I prefer, that the ending be only "YOUR WILL FOR ME'....no matter what.   And, Lord....You know I am not capable of deciphering what is best for my life.  I have on many, many occasions decided that "this is the way to go".....or....."this is the best thing to do".  And, gone off in a tailspin to conquer the task.  Then, blinking hard at the result and seeing that "I just may have been wrong on this one"....admit defeat.  Only You, Father ....can take the broken pieces I hand You and give me back something that would be described as perfection. If changing me into this "different person" I claim I want to be, would remove these miracles from my life, then I would say..."Lord, throw this request away and replace it with...."Whatever it takes to draw closer to You, Lord....that's what I am willing to be....".  So, with that said, Lord...."Take my life and let it be....consecrated Lord for Thee...Take my hands and let them move a the impulse of Thy love...and my feet....swift and beautiful for Thee....my voice....let me sing always and only for my King....my silver and my gold; not a mite would I withhold.  And, my will..."Make it thine.".
 If I am who You want me to be....then so be it.  I am willing, Lord to be wholly Yours....and happy to do so.  As I write....You inspire me. Thankfully.  And...  You make me glad that I am me.  I guess I don't want to be "DIFFERENT" afterall.   Thank You for the power of the cross and Your willingness to grant me entrance.  In all I say....and pray....the name of Jesus be glorified.  Amen.