Good morning, Father! I am so happy to be here....talking to You. I feel so grateful for Your touch on my life. I am so blessed and I do not ever want to take that for granted. You have allowed me to have so much. Even though it is not mine, You provide a home for my husband and I to live in. It is nice....and a comfort to us. A sanctuary of sorts, I guess. We both walk in and feel...safe. Perusing the channels the other day, I saw so many displaced individuals sleeping on the ground.....no safe place to go....tears of sadness and frustration because they are in danger of dying from the hands of evil men or no food. Lord, to live where there is little worry of those hardships is a blessing. I could be on another side of the world, wondering if we'll be alive by end of day. Lord, wherever I am....I love knowing that You are by my side. That You are guiding my hand.....and giving me wisdom when I need it the most. Of course, I often sidestep the fact that it is vital for me to ask. Help me to to take Your Word....and then, never forget that it is sharper than a double edged sword. That it is there for my benefit. It is to be a comfort to me. The writers You inspire to tell their stories in the devotionals I love to read .....show me just how You love to inspire our lives.....how we all are so much alike (actually more alike than different), and how the evil one trys to destroy what we have tried to build with You. It annoys me when I realize that just one distrustful , deceitful, evil word from him.....and I tend to fold. I feel at times that the fetal position I am in, is par for my course in life. I don't want to be there, Lord. I need to interact with You continually. And, therein lies my dilemna. Because, I don't interact with You continually. Not like I should. The scripture says something about "praying always....". Lord, I know I breathe prayers throughout a day.....You know.....my "SOS's"......but, that is not enough. Lord, You and I need to connect daily. Sometimes, I hit the end of the day and realize that I have not had much communion with You. (Too often I realize that is where the depleted , emotion-less feelings are created). Yet, I feel Your presence surrounding me....urging me....lifting me.....encouraging me. And, even when Your coffee needs warming up....and I forget and leave you because I've run off to put out a fire somewhere.....You go and help Yourself, fill Your own cup, and You're waiting there when I get back. Lord....how do You love me? Let me count the ways. I am overwhelmed by Your promise to never leave us or forsake us......and I realize that is until we cut You out of our lives by an act of our own will. How blessed I am to know You personally as my own Savior and friend. I have spent time reading and studying Your plans for me this week. I do tend to backpeddle when I think You want more from me than I can give. I promise not to argue. I will call on the name of the Lord....since You are my strong tower. I will obey. I found the one devotional especially poignant.....and never realized I could ask You to help ME to LOVE YOU MORE! It seems so .....self-serving? Is that the word? Far be it from me to try to analyze something like this. I am just going to do it. I really believe You gave it to me personally....and I will do it. I remember when You gave me "Lord, Change Me!" by Evelyn Christenson. I had never read anything like it and believed it was written just for me.....and Lord, You know I have lived that formula for many, many years. It has been my salvation, over and over again. So.....Lord, You do have Your work cut out for You. I am asking for this love. The author said "insatiable love". I barely understand that but I am going for that. This from someone who found it difficult to say, "I love You, Lord!" to Your face. (I said before that we , as women are more alike than different......I'm sure I am alone here.....no one else is this weird). Anyway, Lord.....since You know me best.....and understand me best.....and love me through it all.....I find myself leaning on You again....asking for Your blessing and all I need.....in Your name and will.
I love You, Lord.....and lift my voice to worship You.....take joy my King....in what You hear.....may it be a sweet , sweet sound in Your ear. Amen and Amen.
No comments:
Post a Comment